queelez: A self-portrait done in an icon maker (Self Portrait)
[personal profile] queelez
God dammit, why do I have to be so dammed candid?

So. As many of you know, I have a vast quantity of internet friends. (Y'all know this because, well half of you are said friends). I also really love getting to know people--online and offline. There are few things I like more than chatting away with some nifty person, particularly if they're into the same things I am. And especially if said 'thing' is RPing.

It'd just be really nice if I remembered that not everybody is like that.

I had an RP with somebody. It was going pretty well. Interesting line, great characters, fantastic dynamic, etc etc. Today, though, they hadn't posted for a few days (despite being online), and they've been pretty punctual so far. I gently asked them if they wanted to get some tagging done tonight.

As it turns out, they've been working up the courage to tell me they wanted to drop the line. There were two reasons--one was a perfectly legit mismatch of styles (Our characters had known each other for years before the RP began, and I was referencing things that had happened without talking to them first. Original characters, too, so they thought I was controlling their character a little bit. Just a bit of conflict of terms, which was my fault for not finding out in the first place).

Second, though, was that they were a bit uncomfortable with how... well, open I was. You all know me, especially you folks I've met via Icy's or RPing. I let my e-mouth run, rant about random things, and ask questions about the other person like woah. But I'm not... I mean, I'm not trying to be creepy or overbearing. I just really like getting to know people. I'm one of those weird sorts who's legitimately interested in how somebody's day is.

The person didn't think I was being a stalker, though, which was almost a bit worse. It was just not what they were used to, I guess? I dunno, I was a bit too chicken to ask. I mean, has anybody else thought this about me? Has everybody else thought this? Do I come across as some creepy internet stalker?

I honored their wishes to end the line, and I redid my core journal a bit to hammer home the point that I talk, and people should tell me if it's getting too much. The second part didn't really make me feel better.

Sorry for the embarrassing ranting, folks.

Fuck.

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queelez

October 2011

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